REVIEW: Johnny Gruesome (2018)
Gary! Gary! There’s someone’s body in the gym without a head!… It’s Todd… How do you know?… His head’s in my locker.
.
.
Johnny Gruesome is a tale of lost love and revenge presented in the form of a horror comedy. It has been decades in the making, and the film has finally arrived.
Johnny Gruesome was written, directed, and produced by Gregory Lamberson. This is Lamberson’s third incarnation of Johnny Gruesome. Lamberson first published it as a novel of the same name. Then, in 2007, Lamberson adapted it into a short film, simply titled Gruesome, starring Erin Brown aka Misty Mundae. And it has now recently been turned into a feature. Lamberson has been making films since the eighties. He has published many novels. I, for one, own one or two of his books. He’s both an award winning filmmaker and author. Lamberson’s film, Killer Rack, which featured Lloyd Kaufman, donated some of their merchandising profits to the Lynn Sage Foundation, a breast cancer charity.
Johnny Gruesome is about a rebellious teenager in a group of metalhead outcasts. Johnny has his beautiful girlfriend Karen, his friend Gary, and his best friend Eric (who sticks out of the group since he is both a jock and a virgin.) One night during some drunken mishaps, Gary accidentally kills Johnny, and Eric and Karen help him cover it up. Johnny returns, seeking revenge on all the ones that wronged him.
The film had great production value. It was very well made. It was beautifully shot. The cinematography and direction were very professional, although sometimes the blocking was a bit awkward. The film was also cut very well. The practical effects weren’t too bad at all. There were a few moments where it looked a little cheesy, but for the most part, it worked. They also made good use of claymation at the end, which was refreshing in this day and age of CGI, and very reminiscent of The Evil Dead.
Also, probably the best part of this film was the soundtrack. It seemed custom made for the film. It was catchy, and set the mood perfectly. Two actors really shined. Michael DeLorenzo, who played Johnny’s dad, was by far the best actor in the film. Aprilann is truly one of the main reasons to see this film. Her acting wasn’t extremely strong, but her beauty and the fact that she gets naked truly gives this film a watch. Kudos to Aprilann’s performance since she has little to no acting experience prior to Johnny Gruesome, yet was able to deliver one of the best performances in the film. She is actually a musician, and even contributed to the soundtrack.
Johnny Gruesome was panned by critics and viewers through countless reviews and message boards. For anyone calling Johnny Gruesome a “no budget” film has obviously never made a movie. A quarter of a million dollars is no way at all “no budget.” Of course it doesn’t come anywhere near close to those big Hollywood blockbusters, but Almost Human premiered at the Toronto International Film Festival and was distributed by IFC Midnight with only a fifty thousand dollar budget. So think about that.
At the end of the day, this movie wasn’t good. It did have a lot of things going for it. With good production quality, a great soundtrack, and decent effects, you wouldn’t think that two things could ruin a movie, but the writing and acting were just too bad. The film was completely void of emotion. The characters had no chemistry. The lines weren’t delivered properly.There was absolutely no character development. I found myself not caring about any of the characters. It was just a bunch of events occurring one after another. It did not have a true narrative. It almost feels like whoever wrote this was completely lacking of life experience. You have a small armed goth kid with no definition beating up jocks. Then the dad drinks himself to death with white wine. Johnny’s killing spree has no rhyme or reason. He even goes after people who were nice to him.
.
Even the moments that should be climactic are just brushed by. Johnny’s resurrection happens subtly in the background. It’s hard to believe that the writer of this film is an award winning author who has written many books and has been making films since the eighties. They also need to fire their assistant director, because the blocking of the extras was more than awkward.
The supporting cast were much stronger than the main cast. The worst performances came directly from the film’s stars: Anthony De La, Byron Brown II, and Chris Modrzynski. There were a few jokes that would have really hit if these actors were able to deliver them properly. If the actors ruin the jokes, is it still a comedy? Such a great line got butchered by Anthony De La. A character asked Johnny why he wasn’t dead, and he replies “I couldn’t sleep.” That could have been such a great line. Anthony De La’s performance was way above both Byron Brown II and Chris Modrzynski. In comparison, you could call it Oscar worthy.
This film had a lot going for it. But the writing and acting just made it nearly un-watchable. Would I watch this film again? No. Would I have paid to watch this? No. Would I have watched this for free on a streaming service and not feel like I wasted an hour and a half of my life? Probably. I respect what this film was trying to do. I also respect Gregory Lamberson for the years he has committed to the genre. But, for the sake of honesty, I could not recommend this film to anyone. Maybe if it was campier, it could be ironically enjoyed. But it’s not even there. This film has given me one gift… and that is Aprilann. Please look her up. She is a beautiful and talented musician and performer. Plus, she got naked in Johnny Gruesome.
.
.
.
